Saturday, January 17, 2009
Greetings,
Last Saturday, approximately 500 people attended the Memorial ceremony to send off our brother Timothy Raymond Aguilar, the man who walked with the medicine name “Whispering Eagle”. We weren’t certain as to how many people would attend but we set up 200 chairs which was the capacity for Gildred Hall at camp Hess Kramer. People were sitting on the floor and standing wherever there was space including on the patio and in the foyer to the hall. We were not able to utilize Gindling Hilltop camp, where we normally have held our retreats, because a kosher women’s group was using the facility.
The hall had been decorated with 4 altars, and we crafted the ceremony to commemorate Timothy in ways that we felt were appropriately fitting for this occasion. Many men and women worked all week to organize and convene this event. It was truly a love fest with an equal number of men and women opening their hearts to grieve and to express their emotions that also held an array of feelings including gratitude for what Timothy had shared and provided along the way. During the commencement of the ceremony the bagpipe player that has performed the music for such films as Braveheart and Titanic played the theme from Braveheart, one of Timothy’s most favorite pieces of music. Ed Munter and Tommy Holmes also graced us with songs that they had written.
Christine Grey (longtime friend of the Aguilar family), Medicine Woman Irene Skau, Andrew Soliz, women from Timothy and Irene’s Sacred Souls community and men from the Sacred Path Wisdom Council participated in the ceremony and evolution of the day. I was honored to be one of 3 people to offer brief eulogies including Mark, Timothy’s cousin, and Sherry, his girlfriend. Steve, Timothy’s brother, offered a touching and humorous in-depth eulogy providing us with an experience of Timothy as an energized boy growing into manhood. Chris Rudy put together a compilation CD of 18 of Timothy’s invocations and talks during our recorded retreats. We played one of the tracks that had the Braveheart theme underlying it while Herb Rubenstein showed a series of slides reviewing Timothy’s younger years and his time with the Sacred Path community on retreat. The ceremony ended with a spirited drum and dance circle. What a fantastic way to celebrate and send off a great man who touched so many lives in such memorable ways.
Chris has offered to make copies of the CD for those that would like to donate to a scholarship fund established in Timothy’s name. We’ll be providing more information separately about the CD and the Timothy Aguilar Memorial Scholarship Fund.
Andrew told the participants that it is a customary tradition to understand that it takes 13 moons to fulfill one’s grieving process and last Saturday was the first of the series of full moons. I have received so many messages from people and have spoken with several individuals that have just heard the news of Timothy’s passing. The depth of the grief that people are expressing is quite touching. Though we will continue to experience waves of grief over the next year we will also move forward in ways that will honor the memory of Timothy through our well-implemented intentions on behalf of our expanding community. The spring retreat in April16-19 will be a combination Sacred Path Men’s Retreat and Call to Adventure Rites of Passage Retreat for fathers and sons, boys and mentors. This will also allow us to commemorate Timothy on the hill. Many men that were present at the Memorial told me of their intentions to attend this retreat.
We have an opportunity to gather sooner than later for a day to look at our lives mentally, emotionally, physically and spiritually. In two weeks on Saturday, January 31st we will come together to explore what it means to be Healthy, Wealthy and Wise. Cardiologist Howard Elkin, Fitness Trainer Chris Rudy and businessman Richard Bizzaro will join me in presenting information and facilitating a discussion of significant areas of concern to men regarding their lives today. What I have noticed is the dramatically increased level of stress confronting people today. From the economy to personal health issues to relationship concerns people appear stretched to the max. One of the men coined a new word to describe what he has been feeling: stressure is a mix of pressure and stress. The intent of this Symposium is to provide participants an opportunity to kick off the new year on the right footing and to put in place a foundation for reducing stress and enhancing the capacity for maintaining balance in the midst of ups and downs and the continuity of progress during the evolution of change.
As you may know, these programs are provided for your edification and well being in addition to generating the funds to run the Men’s Center and to be able to provide more programs. We do not take any personal remuneration for facilitating these programs. We are grateful for your support of the programs and the Men’s Center. I am also aware that there are those among you that though you would desire to attend you may feel it necessary to decline due to the pressing financial considerations you have regarding where to spend your money these days. In awareness of the financial demands that you may be contending with, feel free to request a reduction in the fee so that you can attend this event. You will find further information and a registration form on the Symposium below. If you are planning to participate please register right away so that we have a sense as to how many will be in attendance.
On a final note, the Saturday before Christmas was a special day. Steve Branker, LeVar Burton, Grant Mays, Phil Gross, my son, Derek, and I had the joyful opportunity to participate in Cameron Bonner’s C.U.R.E. Christmas party at Helen Keller Park. This was the third annual event and 3 years ago there were 50 people in attendance and this year there were over 2,000. We met and spoke with so many incredible people that came together to make a positive difference in the lives of so many children and in their community. I was also thrilled to meet USC Coach Pete Carroll and Brian Center from A Better LA. The Men’s Center is entering a partnership with this organization so that we can expand our ability to support the C.U.R.E. program and provide more scholarships to inner city kids so that they can attend or Call to Adventure retreats. Check out the You Tube video of the event in the link below.
In the spirit of the days ahead as we celebrate the life of Dr. Martin Luther King and the inauguration of Barack Hussein Obama I send you my best wishes for a blessed New Year,
Stephen
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